{"id":5971,"date":"2018-10-03T15:44:55","date_gmt":"2018-10-03T15:44:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blnebeuk.serveur04.com\/blog\/?p=5971"},"modified":"2018-10-03T15:44:55","modified_gmt":"2018-10-03T15:44:55","slug":"jose-mourinhos-golden-rules","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.netbet.co.uk\/blog\/2018\/10\/03\/jose-mourinhos-golden-rules\/","title":{"rendered":"Jose Mourinho’s Golden Rules"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Iconsport<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Football is a complicated business. It may seem simple at first glance. 11 men per side try to score more goals than the other team over 90 minutes. But you\u2019re missing the bigger picture.<\/p>\n

You\u2019re not taking account of the little horses or the cows. You haven\u2019t checked whether the supermarket sells grade 1 eggs, or whether it\u2019s even open. And you probably haven\u2019t even considered who you want to play you in the movie of your life. This sort of thing takes vision, and when you\u2019re operating on such a high level, it\u2019s not surprising that us mere mortals sometimes have trouble understanding it.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t worry though, we\u2019ve trawled through his various philosophical musings to find a few rules that must be obeyed.<\/p>\n

IT\u2019S NOT MY FAULT<\/strong><\/p>\n

An essential and pivotal factor in Mourinho\u2019s rules. It\u2019s actually the most important one. Deflection onto some other factors, like weather, referees, pitches are all vital to the inner Mourinho.<\/p>\n

\u201cLook, I’m a coach, I’m not Harry Potter. He is magical, but in reality, there is no magic. Magic is fiction and football is real.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cEvery time I play Pep [Guardiola] I end up with 10 men. It must be some sort of UEFA rule.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSome clubs are treated as devils, some are treated as angels. I don\u2019t think we are so ugly that we should be seen as the devil and I don\u2019t think Arsene Wenger and David Dein are so beautiful that they should be viewed as angels.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThe best team lost. After they scored only one team played, the other one just defended for the whole game.\u201d<\/p>\n

LET ME TRY TO EXPLAIN THIS IN TERMS THAT YOU IDIOTS CAN UNDERSTAND<\/strong><\/p>\n

Some might find this patronising, others might find it endearing. The media love Mourinho\u2019s analogies as they\u2019re perfect headline material. Like a good cake, they\u2019re good for the first 24 hours, but eventually the novelty factor wears off and it becomes stale.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s like having a blanket that is too small for the bed. You pull the blanket up to keep your chest warm and your feet stick out. I cannot buy a bigger blanket because the supermarket is closed. But the blanket is made of cashmere.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou may as well put a cow in the middle of the pitch, walking. And then stop the game because there was a cow.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYoung players are like melons. Only when you open and taste the melon are you 100% sure that the melon is good.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe are a little horse. A horse that still needs milk and to learn how to jump.\u201d<\/p>\n

I AM JOSE MOURINHO, YOU FOOLS<\/strong><\/p>\n

He is of course The Special One, as he announced on his arrival at Stamford Bridge over a decade ago. He returned to West London in 2014 claiming himself as The Happy One. Two and a half years later and the Chelsea dressing room had a stench about it very similar to the one currently at Old Trafford.<\/p>\n

\u201cI am Jose Mourinho and I don’t change. I arrive with all my qualities and my defects.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPlease do not call me arrogant because what I say is true. I\u2019m European champion. I\u2019m not one out of the bottle, I think I\u2019m a special one.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201c[God] must really think I\u2019m a great guy.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI have a problem, which is I\u2019m getting better at everything related to my job since I started.\u201d<\/p>\n

As it stands, Jose looks like he could be shown the door at any point, so you could check out the latest odds for who might become the new Manchester United manager right here on NetBet.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Football is a complicated business. It may seem simple at first glance. 11 men per side try to score more goals than the other team over 90 minutes. But you\u2019re missing the bigger picture. You\u2019re not taking account of the little horses or the cows. You haven\u2019t checked whether the supermarket sells grade 1 eggs, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":3147,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_lmt_disableupdate":"","_lmt_disable":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[52,1501,271,1500,18,1209,242,927],"class_list":["post-5971","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-football","tag-football","tag-football-managers","tag-jose-mourinho","tag-man-united","tag-manchester-united","tag-mourinho","tag-pogba","tag-sanchez"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nJose Mourinho's Golden Rules - NetBet UK<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"The Special One has always had a way with words. 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